Homer: (reading the paper) "Asleep at the switch"! I wasn't asleep, I was drunk!
Bart: I believe you, dad.


Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (4 Votes)
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Characters:
Homer Simpson, Bart Simpson
Episode:
The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 11: "Homer the Vigilante"
Show:
The Simpsons
Related Quotes:
Homer Simpson Quotes, Bart Simpson Quotes, The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 11 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 5 Episode 11 Quotes

Jimbo: Hey, you're that drunken posse. Wow! Can I join ya?
Homer: I don't know, can you swing a sack of doorknobs?
Jimbo: Can I!
Homer: You're in. Here's the sack.
Moe: But you gotta supply your own doorknobs.

Grampa: You see? Old people aren't so useless after all. Malloy's old and he outsmarted the lot of you. And I'm even older and I outsmarted him. (Laughs)
Moe: Shut up.
Grampa: I've had my moment.