NCIS
Mondays 8:00 PM on CBSAnthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Sonja: Tony DiNozzo. Why does your name ring a bell?
Tony: I'm kind of a legend in the NCIS world.
Sonja: I don't know anything about that. I transferred from ATF.
Tony: ATF? Ever work with Zoe Keates?
Sonja: Yeah. Training exercises in Georgia. You two are dating!
Tony: Ah. Well that's over now.
Sonja: Well I hope for your sake she ended it, cause that girl was mean on the jujitsu mat.
Tony: I miss that.
Abby: Luca, this is very special Agent Tony DiNozzo. Tony, this is my little brother Luca.
Tony: It's nice to meet you, Luca. You're under arrest.
Tony: He's a dead man. Bishop's the last person you'd expect to slit someone's throat in their sleep.
McGee: Which would make her the first.
Tony: Now you're catching on.
Bishop: You know I can hear every word you're saying.
Tony: That's impossible. I'm whispering.
Tony: I got it. You dumped Jake.
McGee: Like a hot potato.
Tony: Dumped him.
Tony: Special Agent Fornell! Look at that. Your hair grew back, almost.
Fornell: You see, this is why you're my least favorite, DiNozzo. [Glances at McGee] Scratch that. Second least favorite.
Tony: Name of the boat is crucial. I had mine picked out for years. Go ahead, you'll never guess.
McGee: The Codfather.
Tony: We've been working together too long.
Fornell: All right, this is too pathetic. Grab your stuff, let's go.
Tony: Go where?
Fornell: My house.
Tony: You're inviting me to your house for Thanksgiving dinner? I thought I was your second-least favorite?
Fornell: You are. But dry turkey, blackened dinner rolls....it's really more of a punishment.
Tony: So now that we're friends, can I call you Toby?
Fornell: Don't push your luck.
McGee: You know I once dated a girl who had pteronophobia.
Tony: What is that?
McGee: A fear of being tickled with a feather.
Tony: That's interesting. Kinky. Wait a minute. You haven't dated that many people. Do I know this person? Is it Delilah?
McGee: No. It's not Delilah.
Tony: Is it Abby? It is! It's Abby!
McGee: Listen. She will kill me, okay? You have to promise, promise that you will not tell her.
Tony: I promise. You have my word as a gentleman, I promise.
Green: Is this THE DiNozzo?
Malone: In person.
Green: Hey, you are a legend around here. I've heard a lot of wild stories about you. Tell me about the naked bust. That's not true.
Tony: That is 100% true.
McGee: So who was naked, you or the perp?
Tony: Both of us. I was undercover at a nudist colony.
Malone: See we got this tip. Pole dancer was stealing from her boss, so she's hiding out in a nudist colony. DiNozzo volunteers to go undercover.
McGee: Of course he does.
Green: Is it true you spotted her right away but didn't make the arrest for two days?
Tony: Three days.
Tony: Bish is in the cone of silence. Do you know who she's talking to?
McGee: Jake, I think. Obviously something she doesn't want us to hear.
Tony: She seems a little down. Think maybe I should talk to her.
McGee: Leave her be.
Tony: Maybe she's in need of a little brotherly advice.
McGee: Bishop have you not noticed how extra quiet Gibbs has been, lately?
Tony: See, he's on about this. I don't agree with you.
Bishop: Lately?
Tony: Thank you
McGee: So when are you going to go talk to her?
Tony: There's nothing to talk about. I'm sorry about what happened, but I was doing my job. That's it. Of course it bothered me that I lied to her. I was in love with her. But it was a long time ago and her husband is missing and there's nothing to talk about.
McGee: So when are you going to go talk to her?
