Pete: Artie, this guy has no sense of humor. He doesn't laugh at the jokes.
Artie: Your jokes Pete?
Pete: Yes.
Artie: Give that a little more thought.

Myka: Is it possible that...
Artie: That, yes Virginia, there really is a Santa Claus.

Claudia: Can I hug you?
Artie: Maybe later in the week.

Artie: The Corsican vest. Where did you find that? Venice?
Wells: Ft. Lauderdale.
Artie: Of course.

Claudia: Artie can I talk to you about something?
Artie: Will it make me feel old and uncomfortable?

Artie: Resurrection is a dangerous practice and always comes at a price
Pete: Yeah, look at Mickey Rourke.

Claudia: We will talk later.
Artie: Will hell be freezing over?

Pete: Are we back? Are we in deep doo doo?
Artie: Oh more than you know.

This is Adwin Kosan, he is on a need to know basis, and you don't need to know.

Artie: You spoke to H.G. Wells about official Warehouse 13 matters, and you didn't tell me?
Myka: I was waiting for the right time.
Pete: This ain't it.

Claudia: Hey Artie, the keys are over there.
Artie: From here I can count eight ways you can escape. Wait, the spatula, make that nine.

Pete: I would be honored to have a life like yours.
Artie: I would be honored if you'd try for a little more.