Bernadette: Why don't I get you a job at the Sitting Around All Day Wearing Yoga Pants Factory?
Penny: They're comfortable.
Howie, I love you,and as your wife, your mother is every bit as much my problem as she is yours, so ... I want a divorce.
Bernadette: You know, you're always talking about having a baby someday. This is exactly what it's gonna be like.
Howard: No, it's not.
Bernadette: Come on. The constant fussing, eating, pooping, burping, drooling. We're even waiting for the day when she can finally walk on her own.
Howard: Maybe you're right. Anything she finds on the floor goes right in her mouth.
Bernadette: Girl Sprouts?
Amy: My mom made it up as an alternative to the Girl Scouts. She didn't want me selling cookies on a street corner like a whore.
Bernadette: This is pretty cool. You don't see too many spherical cakes.
Amy: I wonder why that is.
Bernadette: How's your soup?
Howard: Ah, it's all right. They could've filled the bowl a little more.
Howard: Excuse me.
Bernadette: Where are you going?
Howard: I need some fresh air.
Emily: Been there.
Sheldon: Quick poll: PS4 or Xbox One? Raj.
Raj: Uh, Xbox One.
Howard: Both great.
Bernadette: I like the Wii.
Sheldon: Thanks, Grandma
Well, I told Howie if I wasn't busy I'd spend the night at his mom's. So for God's sake think of something.
Bernadette: Raj, your tag's sticking out.
Raj: Thank you. That's the closest I've come to sex in like 2 years.
Bernadette: Well, I feel gross.
Raj: Now it's making it seem more real for me.
Bernadette: Have you guys ever thought about getting a dining room table?
Amy: Yeah. You actually do have room for one up there.
Raj: Oh, sure, I sit on the floor for years, no one cares. The pretty white girl's there ten seconds, and suddenly we're all running to Ikea.
Penny: Okay, sex is not what makes you a grown-up.
Bernadette: Yeah, or you'd be the oldest one here.
Penny: Really? Is that how you talk to your mother?
Those tickets were pretty expensive. I had to give Howie an advance on his allowance. Now he's never gonna put his toys away.