Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCClaire Dunphy Quotes
Am I a bad enough parent to ignore that?
I know Phil and I are going to grow old together someday, but today is not that day.
Claire: I'll be upstairs, Clive, don't take too long.
Phil: I never do.
Claire: We need a game plan, we need to map out exactly what we are going to say, because that is the only way I will be able to hold it together while our babies look at us with judgment and disgust.
Phil: That's how they always look at us.
Phil: We were, as they say, having sex.
Claire: That's not a euphemism. That's actually what we were doing.
Honey, look at how long it just took us to figure out she's insulting us.
It's an obsessive-compulsive thing. I have read like a hundred articles about it.
She suggested an Arabian Nights theme. Isn't it a little soon?
You can't have two fun parents... You know that kid Liam who wears pajama pants to school and pays for things with a hundred-dollar bill? Two fun parents.
Luke: Dad's like crazy fun, but you're nice.
Claire: I'm nice?!?
Luke: Well, not now.
Claire: Did you make the ladyfingers? Did you go to the gym?
Phil: Boy, you're really starting to sound like your old self.
Claire: You're in a house of horrors being held against your will.
Alex: Yeah, I know, so why do I need the cage.