[to Elena] You're lucky you're adorable because your eternal optimism is super annoying.

Mom, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. Give me a chance to make it right. Give me a chance to let you love me. Okay?

Damon: What do you think I should do?
Stefan: That's the thing, Damon. I can't tell you. Elena can't tell you. You have to want to be human for yourself.

Elena: Do you think this is funny?
Damon: Yes, Elena, I find hilarity in the lengths I need to go to to save your life

I'll be super pissed if you lock me out.

Stefan: Well, this looks promising.
Damon: Eh. I’ve seen worse.

Put the damn crossbow down, Pocahontas.

I don't side with anyone. You piss me off. I want you dead.

Damon: Somewhere along the way, you decided I was worth saving. I wanted to thank you for that.
Elena: You're welcome.

Elena: What happened?
Damon: Katherine happened.

Elena: You've been dodging my calls.
Damon: Busy day. Dead fake girlfriend and all.

Well, Matt lives to hate vampires another day, Stefan's on Caroline duty, and I just introduced Mom to Uber. I'm taking bets on which one goes South first.

Vampire Diaries Quotes

Oooh, you know I don't know. Every time we try and go on a date you get kidnapped, I get sent to a prison world, or your feelings get compelled away...

Damon

Damon: My new girlfriend. Andie Starr. Action News.
Alaric: It's not called Action News.
Damon: I know. I like just saying it.