Dr. Cox: Boy, I tell you what, there, Jordan, I'm sure glad that shift is-
Denise: Perry! I was just telling Jordan here about that sneezing attack that I had this morning. Was it fourteen or fifteen sneezes?
Jordan: Yes, Perry, was it fourteen or fifteen sneezes?
Dr. Cox: What are you doing here, Denise?
Denise: Well, I heard that you were doing back to back shifts, so I pulled a couple of strings so that we could get the old band back together!
Jordan: Perry! You've always wanted to be in a band!
Denise: Get out of town! I just came up with that band thing!
Jordan: Get out of town, Perry!

Denise: You know, you don't get this kind of rush on a normal job. You don't, you don't, you don't, you don't, you don't. You know what I'm saying?
Dr. Cox: You're saying you don't.
Denise: Well, Perr, sometimes you do.

It's okay. Hey, Perr. I just saw an adorable interracial gay couple. Aw, just precious.

<i>Denise slams on the breaks to avoid hitting J.D. and Turk</i> Denise

Dr. Cox: Oh, happy day. She's blown a fuse. Mm. I swear to God, Jordan, I can't do it again.
Jordan: Perry, it's just one more shift. Just tune her out and she'll eventually leave you alone.
Dr. Cox: Consider it done.
Denise: ...gum gum gum gum gum. Gum.

Denise: Well, laissez le bon temps roulez. Translation: Let the good times roll. See, that's what they say in New Orleans, The Big Easy. You know, that was my nickname in high school - New Orleans. No, I'm just kidding, it was The Big Easy. I was a huge slut! I was, I did everybody.

J.D.: I need you to connect with your patients, okay? If they need some sympathy, dig down in your soul and find some.
Denise: Yo, Mr. Harris! Sucks you'll never walk again.
Mr. Harris: Hell yeah, it does!
Denise: Better, right?
J.D.: No, no, Jo. He...he lost his feet.

Denise: Meet me in the on-call room, pants down, lights off.
Chubby Guy: I just wanna say I am so psyched that you called me back.
Denise: No! No talking. And if you touch me too much, God help me, I will head-butt you again.
Chubby Guy: (whispers) I love you.

You know, it's ironic that cancer starts with can because at this stage there's nothing we can do about it.

Denise: Why you moping around like a tiny girl bitch?
Turk: Wow, can't you ever be like "hi," or even better, "what's up?"
Denise: Sure, what's up tiny girl bitch?

Russel: Jambo doctors. That's Swahili for hello or good morning.
Turk: Oh is it really? I know what it means. I had a jambo juice this morning. A berry blast with echinacea boost. It was delicious. I'm going to live forever, you're gonna be dead. I'm gonna be alive! Alive!
Denise: Wow, sure you didn't get a fem boost in there? That was pretty catty.

Turk: Where's my pastry?
Denise: Too sugary.
Turk: Nothing's too sugary woman
Denise: Tell that to your diabetes.

Cox: You're not going anywhere.
Denise: Would it make a difference if I told you I had a personal issue that makes staying here really horrible for me?
Cox: It would make me quite a bit happier.

Scrubs Quotes

Jordan: All right, I will see you at home in about an hour. Remember to keep him warm, support his head, check his diaper every fifteen minutes; no bouncing around, no loud noise, no TV, no poking the soft spot. And, Perry, you're the only one in my life that I actually have to say this to: Do not yell at, demean, insult, criticize, humiliate, or mock the baby.
Dr. Cox: What are you talking about?
[Jack starts crying]
Dr. Cox: Waaaah!

Laverne: I need to see you in Mr. Bursky's room.
J.D.: Are you flirting with me? You are, aren't you!