Dr. Gregory House Quotes
Keep talking like Wilson and you're face is gonna freeze like that.
Good thing I brought my axe cane.
She needs support and comfort. Both things I famously suck at.
Taub: Can I at least search his house for drugs?
House: Have I ever said no to that question?
House: How often do you use your vibrator?
Carmen: Excuse me?!
House: Your battery-operated Brad Pitt.
Dr. Wilson: You okay?
House: Why wouldn't I be? I solved my case.
Dr. Wilson: But your patient died.
House: I didn't say in time.
Dr. Foreman: I assume you're planning on screwing it up so you want to maximize witnesses.
House: Why does everyone go to that?
Dr. Foreman: Experience.
House: Shut up.
It's real. Unfortunately. Because Vicodin doesn't cause rash, fever, and joint pain. It does make Taub considerably less annoying, though.
House: Why do people believe I'm incapable of doing anything nice?
Dr. Wilson: Experience.
Dr. Wilson: Well, at least the Alzheimer's patient in 202 won't remember she only got half a ham sandwich.
House: I'm doing her a favor.
All right, I'll send along one of your big brothers to help. (indicates Foreman, Chase, Taub) Do you want Scary, Swarmy, or Shorty?
Dr. Foreman: Are you wearing my tie?
Taub: I saw it in your closet, and it happened to match my shirt.
Dr. Foreman: Why were you in my closet?
Taub: Looking for a tie. What's the big deal?
House: Obviously he wants you out of the closet for some reason. I suspect marriage, but I'm liberal that way.
