Venture Brothers
Sundays 11:30 PM on Cartoon NetworkDr. Venture Quotes
Brock: Who do you think supplied the department with new cruisers last year?
Dr. Venture: My tax dollars, for one.
Hank: Santa Claus, for two!
Tiny Attorney: Dr. Orpheus, could you tell the court what you... do? You're a type of... magician?
Dr. Venture: Oh, they have no idea what they're in for...
Dr. Orpheus: If I reach behind your ear, it will not be a nickel I pull out, but your very soul!
Dr. Venture: Goodnight, ladies and gentlemen, you've been a great crowd...
The Monarch: Tears!? Come on! You know that sick deformed freak! You know he was pounding his invisible meat!
Dr. Venture: Your honor, I have children here! I don't want them listening to this potty talk!
Judge: Order! I want that comment struck from the record. And my mind
Tiny Attorney: So... mind-reader... fascinating, could you read the mind of... say for instance... The Monarch?
Dr. Orpheus: If it would please the court.
The Monarch: Objection, no way!
Judge: This is most unorthodox.
Dr. Venture: Unorthodox! The defendant is in a crown for God's sake
Dr. Venture: Is my tie on straight?
Brock: Yeah. You can't miss with a clip-on.
Oh come on! You're going to kill me because I had fake sex on graph paper with a girl who barely spoke to you in real life?!
Dr. Orpheus: My friend! Bedlam has broken out athwart the Kingdom of Venture! Join me in battle!
Dr. Venture: Oh crap. Brock is never going to let me hear the end of this
Dr. Orpheus: You're one lucky duck. Oh, it must be dreamy to have a costumed nemesis--chasing you, wringing his gloved hands in concern of your every move.
Dr. Venture: You're kidding, right?
Dr. Orpheus: It just seems so romantic
Brock: You have some dangerous machinery for sale here. I think you're begging for trouble on this one.
Dr. Venture: I thought you handled all that, and I don't hear any big ideas from you on how to get some quick cash, come on! Most of this stuff is old crap my dad left behind.
Brock: Doc, you have a table over there with a sign that says Laser Death Ray Bargain Bin!
Dr. Venture: Well that's why you have your little ska band there to keep the oddballs in costumes from raising Cain
Dr. Venture: Billy, fess up to the boy. He's been pulling that "boy genius" crap for at least the twenty years that I've known him.
Billy Quizboy: Well, nobody's really impressed with "Master Billy Quizboy, Adult Genius."
Dr. Venture: Like a speech impediment and growth hormone deficiency qualifies you as a "boy genius."
Mr. White: Don't forget the huge head.
Billy Quizboy: I copped to it - now you guys are ganging up on it
Dean: My... no-nos hurt!
Monarch: What the hell are "no-nos."
Dr. Venture: That's the super-adult term my teenage sons use to refer to their genitals. In public. In front of their father
