Saying nothing is not lying. It's just letting the truth speak for itself.

Haley

Uncle Cam, as her future prom date can you please talk to her? You know fashion and stuff.

Haley [about Alex]

Let me burn your clothes!

Haley [to Alex]

Dear College, Cheese makes me gassy, see you in September.

Haley

Haley: Did my 3rd grade teacher say I have ADD or something.
Claire: No honey she said you couldn't A-D-D because she also knew you couldn't S-P-E-L-L.

Are you trying to ruin college for me before it even starts?

Haley [to Phil]

Haley: You're a freshman, what are you doing in second year math?
Alex: You're a senior, what are you still doing in second year math?
Haley: Not still, again!

Alex: Could you L a little less O L? Can't you see what I'm trying to do here?
Haley: Die alone?

Haley: I'm kind hungry mom.
Phil: Oh my god she's back!

Haley: If you do this you'll be a social piranha.
Alex: Yes, I'll be an Amazonian carnivorous fish.

Alex: Mahatma Gandhi went on a hunger strike to stand up for what he believed in.
Haley: That's because no one would eat with him in the cafeteria.

Don't feel. Just go splash water on your face and man up. We're your mother now.

Haley

Modern Family Quotes

You could pretend to get sick at the table. You know cough, stomachache, dealer's choice, I don't care just sell it.

Mitchell

Thank you Uncle Manny!

Haley