The Simpsons
Sundays 8:00 PM on FOXHomer Simpson Quotes
Like Mozart and Johnny Knoxville, my genius can not be stopped.
I'm not a hairdresser. I just put a new lid on a couple of trash cans.
Put a James Taylor CD in the stereo so they think it was a suicide.
Marge: In a good marriage you never say, "I told you so."
Homer: Which is good for me because you're always right.
He's cheating on Selma? Why go out for hamburger when you have rancid steak at home?
Marge: He's mad about a sport result.
Homer: Lousy St. Louis Cardinals can't win the 1985 World Series on classic sports.
Aww, I was standing in this line to use the bathroom, but now my license is expired.
I can't stand to see one of my female children unhappy.
Hello boat store, I'd like to order a boat. What do you mean dial tone?
Masseuses - half doctors, half hookers that solve everything.
First I work? Then I pay? Then I have to eat fruit? Why was I ever born?
Homer: The therapy was too effective.
Dr. Zander: Ah, yes. One of the most common complaints about therapy.
