There are good lies and there are bad lies. It's a little complicated.

Kevin: Most rich people live in houses, not hotels.
Jackie: That doesn't make her crazy.

Fitch [Tweeting]: If I said "cys fib," would people know that's Cystic Fibrosis?
Jackie: If I said FU, would you know that's "eat shit?"

Jackie: How can you read this crap?
Thor: Please, don't amplify my shame.

O'Hara : Do we think Zoey got her pipes cleaned?
Jackie: That's like seeing Santa naked. It's not right.

You're a moron.

Zoey: Honesty is the best policy.
Jackie: No, it's not.

Jackie: You're not a bad guy.
Fitch: That's what I've been trying to tell you.

Zoey: You and Eddie are really cute together.
Jackie: I am not afraid to kill you in front of a priest.

Mo-mo: What's up with O'Hara?
Jackie: Who knows.
Mo-mo: Usually she says hello.
Jackie: No, she only says hello when she's bored. Or when she's wearing something new and she wants someone to notice.
Mo-mo: God, you're right. Those Chanel pumps are hot though.
Jackie: I know she has taste. Doesn't mean she has manners.

O'Hara: I think of you like a sister.
Jackie: Think again.

Fun? This is not fun. This is f--king hard.

Nurse Jackie Quotes

Don't ever say "ta-da." The only people that say "ta-da" are magicians or idiots.

Jackie Peyton

Percoset should never be crushed and chewed, unless you want it to hit your system like a bolt of lightening. Which is only a problem if you're afraid of lightening.

Jackie Peyton