Addison: It is raining.
Sam: You're wet.
Addison: Because it is raining. It rains in Seattle, which is where I left my umbrella. It does not rain in Los Angeles.
Dell: It rains in L.A. It's raining right now.
Addison: Really? Right now?

Cooper: What did they do that was so great?
Sam: Yeah, what did they do?
Naomi: They saved a marriage. Magic?
Addison: Magic.

How is that guy and the guy who hired me a stripper the same person?

Sam: Addison is mad at me because Cooper hired a stripper.
Violet: I'm ignoring the stripper. Today is a day for ignoring things. I am all business today.

Sam: The next girl I date will be amazing. She will be beautiful, she will be intelligent, and she will be rash free.
Naomi: She'll be better than me?
Sam: She will be way better than you. Okay?
Naomi: Okay.

Sam: You have something.
Ginger: Thanks. You're sweet too.
Sam: No, you got something right here.
Ginger: Huh?

Sam: Hey man, what were you thinking?
Pete: It's a long, sad story.
Cooper: Did you do the thing were she...
[Addison and Noami enter]
Cooper: ... ummm, could be pneumonia.

Naomi: No Ginger. She can't be her. Ginger can't be her.
Sam: Okay, you're gonna have to translate from freaked out language to normal people language.

Violet: Look, I know she has the largest chunk in this practice, but we agreed to equal votes. We are supposed to vote! Sam, you ought to do something!
Sam: What, me?
Violet: This divorce is killing us! You need to go apologize.
Pete: Just say you were wrong for walking out, so we can go back to being a happy family.
Violet: Yeah!
Sam: I never... I didn't... I am not apologizing to her. She's the one.... Naomi hires Addison and then moves her in right next door to me. I saw her naked this morning.
Cooper: You saw her naked?
Pete: Did she look good naked?
Violet: Focus!

Sam: It's a power play. Naomi is trying to show that she has the power.
Pete: Why did Addison take the job anyway? Wasn't she a big shot in Seattle?
Violet: Is it just me or did Naomi just run over us with a steam roller.
Pete: Is she crazy?
Sam: Naomi's insane.
Pete: I mean Addison. Is she some kind of crazy person who gets kissed once, then decides to change her whole life?
Cooper: You kissed Addison? Really?
Violet: Focus!

Pete: What is that?
Cooper: Someone is getting happy.
Naomi: Mr. Wilson is giving a sperm deposit. Get away from the door.
Pete: That's a loud deposit.
Sam: Go Mr. Wilson!
Naomi: You guys are so immature these days.

I wanted to see you fight... just once!

Private Practice Quotes

I think I can see your arteries closing up from here.

Jake

"Never talk about your penis when you hug another man."

JACKSON

Private Practice Music

  Song Artist
Song Lost The Mary Onettes
Down In The Valley The Broken West iTunes
Song Message From Yuz The Switches