Franklin: Yeah, we didn't talk the entire summer Peter was at jazz camp.
Bash: Rock camp.
Franklin: With clarinets?

By the time we're done every milfy housewife and cougar's going to be lining up around the block to take lessons from you again.

Bash: That's ridiculous, your Honor. They have no prior records.
Franklin: And their six inch stilettos make flight risk nearly impossible.

Well girls, our job is no different than yours. We're here to get you off.

Franklin: I don't like children.
Bash: They like you.
Franklin: They do but that's just because...
Bash:'re the same size.
Franklin: Shut up.

Bash: We know how men manipulate women. The aw shucks, I'm just shy and quirky. Lets take it slow. The next thing you know it's 2am and your naked in a bouncy house.
Franklin: It's been known to happen.

Carter: Franklin & Bash LLC. Although you weren't actually a Limited Liability Corporation, were you?
Franklin: Truthfully, we just like the way LLC sounds.

I'm sorry I didn't call right away. I wanted to hang out with some scumbags that weren't lawyers.

To me he's just a guy who wouldn't let me watch Walker Texas Ranger because it made a mockery of the law.

I'm afraid to ask what happened to their first lawyer. You've got some blood in your teeth.

It's complicated porn? Maybe we underestimated you.

I'm always cocky. It's an irritating asset. It works well for me.

Franklin & Bash Quotes

See that's a talent, sounding like a total asshole even when you're supposedly saying something sincere.


"Sorry, sorry. Jean Claude Van Damme marathon last night. Unavoidable.