Larry David Quotes
Monena: I can give four blow jobs an hour.
Larry: Four blow jobs an hour?
Monena: Oh yes, I'm good.
Monena: You bought me one little raggedy-ass hot dog!
Larry: Yeah, which you proceded to blow!
Monena: Hey daddy, you wanna date with momma?
Larry: (sees empty HOV lane) Get in the car.
(to country club interviewers) If you're ever looking for a good blow job at a reasonable rate, she's your gal.
Marty: I gotta pick up someone at the airport, and I know it's on the way. Can you give me a lift, please?
Larry: Why don't you ask your father to help jump start the car? (to empty passenger seat) Hey Leo, why don't you give him a push?!
Larry: I hope I can do this. She's fierce.
Jeff: Okay, at first thought it was my imagination, but you're talking really gay.
Hygienist: You remind me of my college history teacher.
Larry: Was he an avuncular, bald Jew?
I thought he had the "good" Hodgkins.
Jeff: Steve the choreographer--you've been spending a lot of time with him?
Larry: I probably picked up some of his mannerisms.
Jeff: Some? All! You're him! You're Steve the gay choreographer!
The dog bit my penis!
Larry: Do me a favor? Next time you use the bathroom, make sure to keep the seat down.
Nat: What are you, pussy-whipped?
Weatherman: The jet stream is controlled by the rotation of the earth. You know who controls that? God!
Larry: There's a jet stream of bullshit coming out of your mouth, my friend.
