Cougar Town
Tuesdays 10:00 PM on TBSPopular Laurie Keller Quotes
Laurie: She almost hit a cop.
Jules: It was a crossing guar. If it was a cop I would have slowed down when sure started chasing us.
Laurie: I'm still young enough that I can totally change who I am.
Ellie: We can only hope.
Jules: Grayson is totally pursey whipped. That is really gonna catch on. pursey magnet, pursey hound.
Laurie: Pursey cat.
Ellie: That's not how it works.
Women do love when men fight for them. There is nothing less sexy than a man that respects a restraining order.
I always hold eye contact with people, it totally freaks out my gyno.
As my uncle dad always told me, check yourself, before you wreck yourself.
That's how it started for my Uncle Max - then he bought some wigs and changed his name to Maxine, but you know what is really funny? He still goes by Max.
I have a rule that every kiss should last three seconds - it's what the Obama's do.
It's not my fault that I am allergic to latex and birth control pills.
Laurie: I feel like people respect my ideas more when they think they came out of magazines.
Ellie: No.
Are you stealing the plot of Erin Brockovich?
Jules: You can't wear fake nails on just one hand, it makes you look like a crazy whore
Laurie: I only had four left and this is the hand I smoke with
