Jeff [about Hannah]: I'm gonna totally hit that.
Lester: May the best stalker win.

Lester: I wanted to thank you Chuck, you made me feel something I haven't felt in a long time...
Morgan: Another human's foot on your body?

Lester: The studs inside are going to ruin our chances with the medium-hot chicks from Underwear Unlimited.
Jeff: I've been drinking this jail juice since I was in diapers, I'll challenge them to a drinking contest and they'll pass out.
Lester: By process of elimination we land the ladies.

Lester [about Carina]: She brought for guys and no beer.
Jeff: Thanks a lot, now our party is a sausage fest.

Grimes stop it. Like a hot piece of toochis like that would get anywhere near a piece of trafe like you.

Morgan [to Big Mike]: The truth is, I just wanted you to stop dating my mother.
Lester: You should be so lucky that a man of his stature would defile your mother

Morgan: Chuck, sorry buddy. We are here to plead our case about Awesome's bachelor party.
Chuck: You know what, not now, guys. I'm in the middle of something.
Lester: The world revolves around the sun, Charles, not you.
Jeff: Ooh, astronomy snap.

Lester: Jeff and I...we've never been to a bachelor party.
Jeff: Never known anyone qualified enough to land a woman for life

Alex [dressed as stripper]: I understand one of you has been a naughty, naughty boy.
Lester: Me, oh my God, pick me, I'm so bad, I've been bad, I've been bad, I'm a bad person, I'm a terrible person.
Jeff: I broke eight and a half commandments on the way to work this morning

Chuck Quotes

Sarah: Wow, I didn't think people still named their kids Chuck. Or Morgan, for that matter.
Chuck: My parents were sadists, and carnival freaks found him in a dumpster.
Morgan: But they raised me as one of their own!

Chuck: Uh, you know, Sis, the thing is, Morgan and I don't really feel like we're fitting in...at my birthday party...'cause we don't know anybody, 'cause they're all your friends, and they all happen to be doctors.
Morgan: Doctors who don't really get our jokes!
Chuck: Well, your jokes

Chuck Music

  Song Artist
Wait It Out Imogen Heap iTunes
Black and Gold Sam Sparro iTunes
Just Dropped In (To See What Condition My Condition Is In) Kenny Rogers iTunes