Lindsay Bluth Fünke Quotes
Get out of our f***ing tree.
Lindsay: I care deeply for nature.
Michael: You're wearing ostrich-skin boots.
Lindsay: Well, I don't care about ostriches.
Lindsay: Oh, I'm up here, Mike. And I'm not coming down. I'm going to save this tree, no matter what it takes!
Michael: Okay. I'll see you when you realize what that bucket's for.
Michael: I'm selling the company jet.
Lindsay: Great, so now we don't have a car or a jet? Why don't we just take an ad out in I'm Poor magazine?
Lindsay: Look, I'm an activist, too, and I appreciate what you're doing for the environment. But we're not the only ones who destroy trees. What about beavers? You call yourself an environmentalist. Why don't you go out and club some beavers?
Johnny Bark: You don't really "get" nature, do you?
Lindsay: Buster's right. You get off on being withholding.
Lucille: Buster said that? My Buster?
(later)
Lucille: Michael?
Buster: Mom?
Michael: What are you doing here?
Lucille: (to Buster) Oh, hello, Buster. Here's a candy bar. (pulling candy bar away) No. I'm withholding it. Look at me. Getting off!
Tobias: Michael, if I could stick my pretty, little nose in here for one second. When I was a psychiatrist, and this is before I became an actor...
Lindsay: You're still not an actor.
Tobias: Lovely... I saw a lot of this type of behavior, and what I think you're experiencing is your son's very normal need to distance himself from his overbearing father. Am I touching something? Watch this. Maeby, where are you off to in this glorious
(Tobias is inadvertently touching the cornballer)
Tobias: Hot! Hot hot!
Michael: Be careful. Are you okay?
Tobias: (whimpers and grimaces for a few seconds) Hot hot...Now, take my daughter for example. She lives her life, and I get the pleasure of guessing what that mind entailed on. Watch this. Maeby, where are you off to in this glorious Sunday afternoon? (whispers to Michael) She won't tell you.
Maeby: I'm going to audition for a play.
Tobias: Well, that time it didn't work...What?! What play?
Maeby: It's for high school. You can't audition.
Tobias: I was totally wrong! She's reaching out to her actor daddy. DOES ANYONE HAVE AN ICE PACK?!
Michael: What's going on? This is exactly where the two of you were when I left this morning. Is nobody going to even try to get a job?
Lindsay: I have a job, Michael. It's called "supporting my husband."
Michael: You certainly haven't been shopping. The only thing I found in the freezer was a dead dove in a bag.
Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? 'Cause I've only got a couple days left to return it.
Lucille: You might want to let that fire go out before you stick your face in it.
Lindsay: Ah, that's funny. Because I was going to say, you might want to lean away from that fire since you're soaked in alcohol.
Lucille: Mine was better.
Lindsay: Did you enjoy your meal, Mom? You drank it fast enough.
Lucille: Not as much as you enjoyed yours. You want your belt to buckle, not your chair.
Tobias: I agree with Michael; it's important not to tie your self-esteem to how you look or what people think of you. I mean, look at me- I'm an actor. An actor, for crying out loud. You know how much rejection I face every day? But in this business of show, you have to have the heart of an angel and the hide... of an elephant.
Lindsay: But, you've never actually had an audition.
Tobias: Well... excuse me! Excuse me.
Lindsay: Roger was my male counterpart in high school.
Roger: Remember how crazy our hair was back then?
Lindsay: Oh ... What were we thinking? So, what are you doing now?
Tobias: He's, uh, casting my commercial.
Roger: Yeah, trying to. The South Coast Boutique is having a fire sale.
Lindsay: South Coast Boutique? They're having a fire sale?!
