Manny: Oh no, who will pee all over the bathroom floor?
Luke: I was brushing my teeth at the same time...you try to do that.

I noticed some lovely some lovely tweens down by the kids' club, maybe we can find a nice spot near them by the pool and send over a couple of virgin Mai Tais. They may be interested in two sophisticated men like us.

Score, this place has an iron in the closet!

I'm just a boy trying to bring style back to travel.

Jay: It's just the doorbell.
Manny: Maybe a demon is ringing it!

Was that the alarm? Has our perimeter been breached?

Manny: Any suggestions?
Jay: I usually go with earrings

Luke: Manny and I are going to practice lay-ups.
Manny: They are deceptively hard. A curious mix of dance and strength.
Luke: You're ruining it again.

Do I have time for a steam?

I don't think I can get through this without crying. Maybe we should just go on to the cold cuts.

Lots of stuff that doesn't kill you makes you weaker.

Manny: Today feels like a good day for halibut. Hey, Jay, did I ever tell you about the time I used peanut butter and jelly for bait?
Jay: I don't know. You tell me a lot of funny things.

Modern Family Quotes

By the way, do not look up peeing games on the internet.

Jay

You can't have two fun parents... You know that kid Liam who wears pajama pants to school and pays for things with a hundred-dollar bill? Two fun parents.

Claire