I'm with you every day. If you're having a baby, trust me, we're having a baby

Great, our witness is Archie Bunker except, you know, not funny.

Mary: One more thing...
Marshall: I'm not giving you my pie.
Mary: Hoarder.
Marshall: Glutton.

And finally, I'm ready to put my gun in your lock box.

Marshall: Maintaining such a dim view of humanity, isn't it exhausting?
Mary: That's why they make energy drinks.

Mary: Don't get me wrong, I like Abigail. I do.
Marshall: You hide it well.

Mary: Man of honor? That's not an oxymoron.
Marshall: Technically, no.
Mary: It's a something moron though, I'm pretty sure.

Marshall: The dulcet sound of a Mary Shannon admission so rarely heard in nature.
Mary: Do you think everyone wants to punch you in the mouth?

Marshall: It's got 140,000 mile on it.
Mary: It's road tested. Durable.
Marshall: Or seen through another lens, a candidate for the junkyard.

Marshall: Your claws are showing.
Mary: They don't retract.

Marshal Mann: Andy, Witness Protection is a little like 'Where's Waldo?'. Waldo is difficult to find because he blends in with the scenery.
Mary: Which is why Waldo doesn't wear a yarmaka.
Andy: This Waldo is Jewish?
Marshal Mann: Hard to say.

Mary: Another day, another dollar.
Marshall: You gotta raise?

In Plain Sight Quotes

One of the most difficult moments in anyone's life is when the fog of childhood lifts and we see for the first time our parents as people.


Marshall: You are in a different kind of mood this morning.
Mary: Actually, I'm in a really good mood. Which is kind of weird considering where I was 48 hours ago. Then I had a witness off herself and, like that is not bad enough, I've got to play second fiddle to a knucklehead like you.
Marshall: Thanks for lumping me in with kidnapping, attempted rape and suicide. Can't tell you how much that means.