Put those crazy eyes somewhere else I’ll fix it!

Dude, I wasn’t paying attention to you. I was watching the show.

Jenna: The Mafia knows?
Ming: Is that a rhetorical question? Of course we do! We're magic.

We shouldn't be meeting on school grounds. Hello Kitty might see us!

If it takes the rest of my life I'm going to take that cunt down.

I asked a White Bitch for Asian Bitch advice! Fuck me!

Ex-nay on the Chinese-a. The mafia is everywhere, and they can't know what I know. It's all about the long play.

I'm gonna bump uglies tonight!

Jenna: What kind of day are we looking at? Lunch in the bathroom?
Ming: Nope, I'm clear for quad exposure. I'm back in with the mafia, big time. They got my parents to buy me a car.
Jenna: You're kidding, why?
Ming: It's a peace offering. Becca's scared sh*tless of you, and by proxy now me.
Jenna: Why is she scared of me?
Tamara: Putting yourself up for public consumption is like batshizat on crack. You're the scariest kind of loose canon Jenna you're a suicide bomber.

Tamara: Holy sh*t!
Ming: Holy sh*t!
Jenna: You are supposed to be calming me down!
Tamara: I am sorry J, but holy sh*t!

Ming: You know my locker combo?
Becca: I also know your bra size, but I'm not gonna advertise it.

Fred: Are you familiar with the difference between a White bitch and an Asian bitch? When a White bitch is after you she's in your face: loud, angry, making sure she knows that you're responsible for your destruction. The Asian bitch...
Ming: derives from the way of the Ninja. They're everywhere and nowhere, all stealth, you never see an Asian bitch coming.

Awkward Quotes

Jenna: This year would be my year. For once I wouldn't be overlooked not with Matty at my... backdoor!
Matty: Oh sorry, I slipped.

For 15 years I fantasized about everyone noticing me as I walked down the hall. What would I be wearing? Would every guy worship me? Would I be five inches taller and have porn tits? No, that was not my reality. My moment in the spotlight sucked some serious ass.

Jenna