Olive: (watching TV) Look there's the killer.
(Oscar walks into The Pie Hole)
Chuck: Look, there's the killer.
Olive: Oh, lord.

That's the most tragic story I've ever heard. Notwithstanding the big ticket items like genocide and famine, but tragic nonetheless.

Emerson: They were all breeders too.
Olive: They make dogs for their polygamy cult?
Emerson: Dog breeders.
Olive: They make dogs for their polygamy cult?
Emerson: Ain’t nobody making nothing for their polygamy cult.

Chuck: I love a good "although."
Olive: Me too.

Olive: Yesterday, a ferrier named Lucas Shoemaker was found dead. Trampled.
Emerson: Why should I care about a dude that sells fur coats?
Olive: Not a furrier, a ferrier. Heir.
Emerson: Fair-rier?
Olive: It's a blacksmith. Puts shoes on horses.
Emerson: Don't try to act like that's a word everybody knows.

Emerson: What did you compete about?
Olive: Promise you won't laugh?
Emerson: No.
Olive: I used to be a professional horse jockey.
Emerson: Hahahaha! (mimics riding a horse) Hahahaha!

Sweet Secretariat

(about John Joseph Jacobs) What if he changes when his blood sugar drops?
Olive Like a hypoglycemic werewolf!


Emerson: You can't die of evilness.
Chuck: Happens all the time you do something mean or hurtful to someone like tell a secret... Bang! You're dead.
Olive: Or Bang! You're not really dead you're just pretending to be dead while other people who think you're dead are heartbroken.
Emerson: Or Bang! You talk too much and you both go wait in the car

Tell Ned I love... his pies.

Olive: Maybe John Joseph faked his death. People do that all the time.
Emerson: No, they don't.

What was that rhyme? I scream, you scream, we all scream because you faked your death!

Pushing Daisies Quotes

Chuck: Do you believe in reincarnation?
Emerson: Hell no. The planet's falling apart. Right now, it's the children's problem. We reincarnate, it's our problem

Vivian: Charlotte was a nice girl.
Lily: With the exception of puberty.
Vivian: Which was when Lily was going through a change of life.
Lily: Impolite to talk about one's menopause in mixed company.