The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSSheldon Cooper Quotes
The four of you are three of my closest friends, and one treasured acquaintance.
My new computer came with Windows 7. Windows 7 is much more user-friendly than Windows Vista. I don't like that.
I'm not crazy; my mother had me tested.
Sheldon: You know, the more I think about it, the "mobster sauce" couldn't possibly contain chunks of mobster.
Leonard: And why is that?
Sheldon: It was listed under "Seafood."
Leonard: Maybe they were mobsters who "slept with the fishes."
I disinfected the kitchen and the bathroom, and now I thought I'd learn Finnish.
If outside is so good, why has mankind spent thousands of years trying to perfect inside?
Raj: Come on, let's get a drink.
Sheldon: I don't drink.
Raj: Well I do, and when my wingman is carrying a Green Lantern lantern, I drink a lot.
Sheldon: I'm sorry Raj, I have no desire to salute any article of clothing tonight, much less one that's linked to race riots in the 1940s.
Raj: Race Riots?
Sheldon: The "Zoot Suit Riots?"
Raj: Ohhhh. I always thought that was some sort of after-Christmas sale.
Raj: We'd just see what's what.
Sheldon: That's a semantically null sentence.
Raj: Good news guys, I got the four hour special edition of Watchmen.
Leonard: Got it.
Wolowitz: Seen it.
Sheldon: Detailed analysis posted online.
Leonard: When we watch Frosty the Snowman, he roots for the sun.
Sheldon: Excuse me, but the sun is essential for all life on earth. Frosty is merely a bit of frozen, supernatural ephemera in a stolen hat. A crime, by the way, for which he is never brought to account.
Sheldon: It's doubtful that his mother will be over-impressed with a woman whose biggest achievement was memorizing the Cheesecake Factory menu.
Penny: Hey, it's a big menu! There's two pages just for desserts!
Leonard: And those specials, they change every day!
Penny: Okay, it's lame when I say it, it's just ridiculous when you pile it on.
