Favorite Winston Bishop Quotes
Winston: Friends don't call friends pathetic.
Nick: But what do friends do when the other friend is taking a shower with a cat?
Girl, I got an obligation...at a...sandwich...meeting.
There's nothing like the feel of a fire, a fresh baked cookie and the sweet, sweet taste of crack in your lungs.
Jess: You're too late. I'm in love. With Winston.
Winston: You know, it just got stuck up there so far, so quickly.
Winston: Nick could be your lawyer.
Schmidt: This Nick? Vivica A. Dropout?
That wasn't a cookie, damn it! That was a piece of his heart.
Schmidt: I'm gonna have sex tonight. Are you two in?
Winston: Is that the way you wanted to say that?
You were denied a cell phone because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost!
Jess: I got laid off.
Nick: Are you serious?
Winston: So nice to meet you, Mr. Kareem Abdul Jabbar. Can I sit on your shoulders?
Winston: There are parts of my butt that only a tub can clean.
Jess: Ew, but okay!
Or we could break into a zoo, steal a bear, then we shoot the bear full of Hep C, we release that bear in the restaurant right as they're about to order dessert.