Mother: Hey, excuse me. My son is interested in becoming a doctor, and I thought maybe you could tell him what it's like.
Turk: I'd love to! I would love to! Do you have a dog, Bowl Cut? Well, I want you to find a pile of its best work and roll all around in it. See, that's how it feels to be a doctor. Because here's the dirty little secret. People don't want your help. They want your dignity, they want your pride, but mostly, they want your money. Good luck in med school. Oh! The next time you see a magic show, the bunny was in the hat the whole time. Peace out!

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Scrubs Season 4 Episode 10: "My Female Trouble"
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Scrubs Season 4 Episode 10 Quotes

J.D.'s Narration: No matter how much we like to pretend otherwise, strong confident women will always have the power over us. Whether they're fighting for respect, fighting for their man, or even just fighting for the hell of it. Strong women make all guys feel the same way.
The three women walking down the hall, past the guys who turn into little boys.
Little Cox: Jordan looks mad, I should go.
Little Turk: I have to pick up Carla's dry-cleaning.
Janitor: Well, what do we have here?
Little J.D.: Oh, no.
Janitor: I heard from a reliable source that you want to live in dumpster. I can arrange that. Yep, I know just the right neighborhood.

J.D.: Neena, it's over.
Neena: No it's not. In fact, I find myself oddly turned on by your timid, baby horse standing up for the first time style of humping.
J.D.: First of all, thank you. Secondly, I've tried to be reasonable, now if you wanna see my dark side, you're gonna see my dark side.
(J.D. starts softly tickling Neena)
J.D.: Ah tickle tickle tickle. Ah tickle tickle tickle tickle.
Neena: Yet another strong moment for ya.