Archer: I'm serious, just radio Lieutenant Colonel. He can straighten this whole thing out.
Military Commander: Lieutenant Colonel who?
Archer: This is embarrassing but I thought his last name was colonel.

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Sterling Archer
Archer Season 6 Episode 7: "Nellis"
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Archer Season 6 Episode 7 Quotes

Ray: Good morning, this is Captian Ray Gillette welcoming you aboard from the flight deck. Flight time to Branson is about 3 hours--
Archer: No it isn't!
Ray: Shut up, and in the meantime..

Cheryl: Let me guess, you're all butthurt because you hired some Pakistani dude to shoot you so you went to Vegas and now you're drunk and broke outside a casino and you want me to wire a $1000 to buy you a plane ticket and a pre-flight whore.
Archer: Ok, I'm gonna list everything you said that's totally wrong. A) I'm not outside a casino so.......