(At the breakfast table, Bart notices that Lisa isn't dressed for school.)
Bart: No way! She's faking! If Lisa stays home, I stay home.
Lisa: If Bart stays home, I'm going to school.
Bart: Fine. Then--Wait a minute. If Lisa goes to school, then I go to school. But then, Lisa stays home, so I stay home. So, Lisa goes to school.
Marge: Lisa, don't confuse your brother like that.


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Characters:
Marge Simpson, Bart Simpson, Lisa Simpson
Episode:
The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 16: "Bart's Dog Gets an F"
Show:
The Simpsons
Related Quotes:
Marge Simpson Quotes, Bart Simpson Quotes, Lisa Simpson Quotes, The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 16 Quotes, The Simpsons Quotes
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The Simpsons Season 2 Episode 16 Quotes

(Homer walks by the Cookie Colossus store in the mall.)
Saleswoman: Aloha!
Homer: Well, aloha!
Saleswoman: Would you like a free sample? (Offers Homer some cookies on a tray.)
Homer: The price is right. (Eats a cookie.) Mmm! Ooh! "Macamademia" nuts.

(Lisa pleads her case to keep Santa's Little Helper.)
Lisa: This is our pet. We can question his integrity and disposition, but we can't question his heart. Are you trying to teach us that the way to solve a problem with something you love, is to throw it away?
Homer: (Sniffling) Oh, Lisa. If they're ever going to pull the plug on me, I want you in my corner, honey. (Hugs Lisa)