Peter: Lois, don't freaking put me through this again.
Lois: Peter, a little culture is good for this family. Besides, you liked the Nutcracker didn't you?
Peter: No Lois, I did not. The Nutcracker had zero physical comedy. And, and, with a name like the Nutcracker, I thought, oh, this would be worth a few yucks. But no Lois, that title wrote a check to those queers on stage refused to cash.


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Characters:
Peter Griffin, Lois Griffin
Episode:
Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16: "No Chris Left Behind"
Show:
Family Guy
Related Quotes:
Peter Griffin Quotes, Lois Griffin Quotes, Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16 Quotes, Family Guy Quotes
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Family Guy Season 5 Episode 16 Quotes

Peter: Chris, I would give you a hug, but I'm exhausted for working two jobs for paying your scholarship. I've been selling buttscratchers-BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows Lois a tiny hand on a stick )
Lois: No, Peter.
Peter: BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows buttscratcher to Lois again )
Lois: Peter, no!
Peter: BUTTSCRATCHER! ( shows buttscratcher to Lois once again )
Lois: NO!
Peter: ( sad ) Buttscratcher...

Lois: Meg and I have been working at nights.
(scene cuts to Meg and Lois in an alley dressed as hookers. Car pulls over)
Man: I'll take the one in the right.
Lois: (opens the car's door ) Well, once again, Meg, I'll be back in an hour.