(Sick kid talking to parents while Cartman lurks outside his window.)
Sick Kid: Oh mommy, I can't wait to be better!
Cartman: Well kid, you're gonna have to wait just a little longer because that $600 is mine.

Eric Cartman
South Park Season 4 Episode 1: "The Tooth Fairy Tats 2000"
South Park
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South Park Season 4 Episode 1 Quotes

Kyle: But you know, I've learned something today. You see, the basis of all reasoning is the mind's awareness of itself. What we think, the external objects we perceive, are all like actors that come on and off stage. But our consciousness, the stage itself, is always present to us.
Cartman: Tits.

Cartman: You guys, you guys! Oh my god, seriously, you guys!
Stan: What the hell's wrong with Cartman?
Kyle: He's fat and stupid.