You sound like my mother being pulled on stage at a 2 Live Crew concert.

Tracy

Liz: I'm not gonna let this dress win. This morning I joined-
Jack: A suicide cult.
Liz: A gym.

I just got my bridesmaid dress for Cerie's wedding. It is a Vietnamese size 2.

Liz

[to Jack] How is your thing weirder than mine?

Liz

Well it was off for awhile because my fiance was on his dad's yacht and got captured by pirates, but now, thanks to the A-Team, he's back.

Cerie

And don't worry, I have a job for me at Fox ... woods.

Khonani

First of all, the secret service never gave me back my t-shirt cannon.

Tracy

Honestly, these immigrants have a tough life, no health care, and I kind of just thought he'd die before it became a thing.

Jack

Tonight's going to be different! There's going to be booze, and a karaoke machine, and that Black Eyed Peas song they wrote for bar mitzvahs!

Liz

You don't want to mess with that stuff, Liz. Ice has caused a lot of ODs in the porn community.

Jenna

Just because he'd run away and cause traffic accidents and impregnate neighbors' horses. He's trapped here just like me!

Tracy

In my defense, every April 22nd I honor Richard Nixon's death by getting drunk and making some unpopular decisions.

Jack

30 Rock Season 4 Quotes

My dear friend Moby just opened a tea house in Park Slope. Do you know him?

Tracy

We'll trick those race car-loving wide loads into loving your, watching your lefty homoerotic propaganda hour yet!

Jack