Evelyn: I need a ride.
Kai: Yup, she's yours.
Ernesto: She's definitely your kid.

Alex: Hey, Evelyn. We good now?
Evelyn: No. But we'll get there.

Diego: How'd you find me?
Alex: Triangulation.

Daddy needs a ride.

Alex

Kai: It's strange seeing [Alex] like this: vulnerable, peaceful, almost likable.
Evelyn: Now you're talking crazy talk.

Evelyn: So who are you? His girlfriend?
Kai: Girlfriend? Eww. No.

Alex: It's a screwed-up job. But that's the way it is.
Evelyn: But you chose that job over us, over me.

Snowglobes on a tropical island? I like the irony.

Evelyn [to Alex]

Evelyn: Hi, Dad.
Alex: Evelyn?
Evelyn: Surprise!

  • Permalink: Hi, Dad.
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Now get out of here. I need to put on my camera face.

Ike [to Kai]

[Amber] thinks "The Scorpion" is the reincarnation of the Dalai Lama and that a triad is some type of scooter.

Alex [to Kai]

Oh, honey, no. We'll fix it. We'll fix it.

Alex [to Amber]

Almost Paradise Season 1 Quotes

No stress, no drama. Just peace and quiet.

Alex [to Doctor]

Doctor: If you don't take them, with your level of hypertension, your heart will become enlarged.
Alex: I know. Ticking time bomb.
Doctor: No. There's no ticking. Just "boom." Heart failure. And trust me that's worse than penis failure.
Alex: That's your opinion.