Archer
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on FXArcher Quotes
Lana: Dude, this van is like rolling probable cause.
Malory: All ashore from the S.S. Date Rape.
Ray: Toot, Toot!
Does Canada even have a spy agency?
Do you like to travel? Because if you don't find that bag, I will empty the entire contents of your body and use your leathery skin as a replacement.
On your knees, hands behind your head, and toss out that weapon! But not in that order.
Lana
Archer: You swallowed a pool ball?
Pam: I wish just one and I still got two to go.
Archer: I don't need a doctor, Katya doesn't have VD!
Malory: You haven't had sex with her?
How is this happy play time? Use your imagines, make a soccer ball out of a dead cat.
Barry: Come on, it's your son's life.
Malory: And my money.
Those cannot be your only shoes. What am I saying? It's Russia. People probably come from miles around just to get their picture taken in those.
Malory: Lana, you go straight to Moscow.
Lana: Undercover?
Malory: Of course undercover.
Lana: As what? Russia's only black woman?
Malory: Ray, get your purse and take some midol, you're going back for him.
Ray: According to these notes from my doctor, a radiologist and my new neurologist I am doing no such thing.
Archer: I thought they just wanted my hair so their scientists could unlock the secret of its luxurious fullness. Touch it, Barry.
Barry: No.
Archer: Come on.
Barry: It's not that thick back here.
