Michael: Don't tell me he's not in Iraq.
Wayne: Oh, no, he is. In fact, he is on the news right now. Turn the TV!
Man on the news: Coming up next: Are bees better at sniffing out drugs than dogs?
Wayne: I'm sure it's coming right up. You see, they won't take all day. (Minutes later, and still not on) I bet it's after these unserious ads. It's like they're always there when I turn the TV on.
Cho: Why don't we go online?
Wayne: Cool your Japanese jets. This is just go -- Uh, it's on!

Adelaide: Take a single step to share your love, Gary. (The disabled guy takes a step) Ahh! Faker! (slaps him in the face and Gary falls down)
Narrator: She was wrong on that one. It was love that make Gary take that step.

Imagine the impact of that scene if it would appear just right after I'd turn the TV on!

Wayne

Burn Bush! Burn Bush!

Iraqi crowd

Sorry it took so long. The Cheney expressway is backed up all the way to Halliburton Drive.

Taxi driver in Iraq

Take Condoleezza Rice Lane -- it's faster.

Buster

Gob: (sobbing) You came for me, Michael ... or should I say Robot!
Michael: Why? 'Cause I'm not crying?
Gob: Michael, maybe you don't have enough RAM to understand this, but there is such thing as brotherly love. (Sees Buster) ... What is he doing here?

Tobias: Well, I am off to buy the perfect present. Maybe she'd like a suit like this.
Narrator: That is her suit.
Tobias: Eh, they probably don't make it in a women's, though.
Narrator: They only make it in a women's.

Michael: So, you just finished off the bottle?
Lindsay: Well, I had to. It's vodka, you know. It goes bad once it's opened.
Michael: I think that's another one of mum's little fibs. You know, like, I'll sacrifice anything for my children.

Michael: So, there's going to be wine at the rehab, huh?
Lindsay: Well, wine only turns into alcohol if you let it sit.
Michael: (to Lucille) How do you come up with these?

When I miss your lips, I'll put a fig in my mouth ... do they have figs over there?

Buster

My love thinks I'm a coward just because I wasted precious hospital resources to avoid my legal obligation.

Buster

Arrested Development Season 3 Episode 12 Quotes

Adelaide: Take a single step to share your love, Gary. (The disabled guy takes a step) Ahh! Faker! (slaps him in the face and Gary falls down)
Narrator: She was wrong on that one. It was love that make Gary take that step.

Michael: Don't tell me he's not in Iraq.
Wayne: Oh, no, he is. In fact, he is on the news right now. Turn the TV!
Man on the news: Coming up next: Are bees better at sniffing out drugs than dogs?
Wayne: I'm sure it's coming right up. You see, they won't take all day. (Minutes later, and still not on) I bet it's after these unserious ads. It's like they're always there when I turn the TV on.
Cho: Why don't we go online?
Wayne: Cool your Japanese jets. This is just go -- Uh, it's on!