Michael: We've got a picture of you with Saddam Hussein.
George Sr.: I thought that was the guy who played the Soup Nazi. I told him how much I liked his work!

George Sr.: You've got to get me out of here.
Michael: You're the one that said no to prison.
George Sr.: I was wrong. There, you just have to shut your eyes and take it. Here, you have to shut your eyes and give it.

Lindsay: You haven't had a serious relationship since your wife, and you guys weren't even speaking towards the end.
Michael: A lot of that was the coma.
Lindsay: Yeah, I've heard your side of it.

Michael: I'm amazed Dad hasn't strangled himself with his belt yet.
Lucille: Oh, we're into all kinds of freaky stuff.
Michael: Why do I eat breakfast before I come here?

Lucille: He's just jealous that I have a man back in my life. And guess what else is back?
Michael: My breakfast?
Lucille: My friskiness. Mama horny, Michael.
Michael: No, it's my breakfast.

Buster: Mother, have you seen my rubber hand?
Lucille: It's in the dishwasher. Your father and I were using it for something.
Buster: Oh for God's sake! Can't you keep my hand to yourself?

Michael: If you're really lonely, maybe it's time you went out there and you got yourself a girlfr.. a pet.
Buster: How about a turtle?
Michael: Great.
Buster: I've always loved those leathery little snappy faces.
Michael: You certainly have a type.

Arrested Development Season 3 Episode 2 Quotes

Michael: I -- I was wondering if you might be willing to go somewhere with me? I -- I will pay you.
Rita: ... You'll pay me?
Michael: Not ... Not for sex. You're gonna think that I'm Jack the Ripper, right? Didn't he kill prostitutes, or ...
Rita: I'm not a prostitute.
Michael: And I shall let you live ... haha. This is my worst hello.

Michael: Pre-schools just go half-day, right? And I'm not trying to pick you up, but is there any way that I can, I can come by, pick you up, and bring you here?
Rita: Yeah, I, um, I suppose I could sneak out at nap time.
Michael: Yes? Perfect, great. And I shall drop you off alive, hooker or no. (mouths 'What is wrong with me?' as he walks off)