There's always money in the banana stand.

George Sr.

Oh, my God! We're having a fire ... sale! Oh, the burning, it burns me! Evacuate all of the school children! This isn't a fever! Ama ... I can't even see where the knob is ... zing grace!


Luz, that coat cost more than your house. (Lucille looks at Michael)
That's how we joke. She doesn't even have a house.


Narrator: Michael realized that his father had even taken control of the banana stand, but he still had some unanswered questions, so he did a little detective work.
Michael: You burn down the storage unit?
T-Bone: Oh, most definitely.

T-Bone: Welcome to Bluth Bananas, where bananas are our business. May I interest you in a banana this day?
Michael: T-Bone, what are you doing here?
T-Bone: Oh, your dad gave me this job.

And so, Lindsay and Maeby separately went to the same restaurant to celebrate the jobs they hadn't actually performed, with money they hadn't actually earned.


Gob: I should be in charge. I'm the older brother.
Michael: Do you even want to be in charge?
Gob: No ... but I'd like to be asked!

(on the phone) Then why don't you marry an ice cream sandwich!


Arrested Development Season 1 Episode 2 Quotes

Okay, we are just about ass-to-ankles back here, Maeby. Do you want to hop on your cousin's lap there, please?


Michael: (to George Michael) I'm gonna give you a promotion. Welcome aboard, Mr. Manager.
George Michael: Wow! I'm Mr. Manager!
Michael: Well, manager. We just say manager. And you can hire an employee if you need one.
George Michael: Do you think I need one?
Michael: Don't look at me, Mr. Manager.
George Michael: Right. It's up to me now. I'm Mr. Manager.
Michael: Manager. We just say, uh --
George Michael: I know, but you just said --
Michael: Doesn't matter who.