Travis: Are there really women out there that will have sex with me just because they're mad about something?
Laurie: Oh yeah, for sure.
Travis: This is very exciting news.
Laurie: You know there are also girls that will sleep with you because their friends are prettier.
Travis: This just keeps getting better.

Bobby: You get a tiny leak in a dam, you gotta plug it up real quick or you'll be in a car with no breaks traveling down trouble highway.
Grayson: Wait, is the highway flooded? Where is this dam? You are mixing metaphors like a crazy person.
Bobby: My mom says I'm colorful.

Bobby: Come on T-bone, you can take my ride.
Travis: You know putting golf cart keys on a Ferrari keychain doesn't make it a Ferrari?
Bobby: I was being ironic.

Ellie: Why are those two so mopey?
Andy: You know that secret I've been keeping since Thanksgiving? Well I'll save the heart burn and stress so I'm just gonna let it out. Bobby and Grayson are both kind of interested in Jules.
Ellie: Are you telling me the overly flirty next door neighbor and the ex-husband who's never not here both like Jules? That is a revelation!

Jules: Not that I would date two guys at the same time anyways, because in grade school this nun told me if I kissed two boys in one day their spit would mix in my mouth and it would kill me.
Ellie: Religion is fantastic.

Bobby: The paint can game is the greatest thing I've ever created in my life.
Travis: And thank you dad.

Jeff: The stay at home and drink date? Always dangerous. Alcohol makes it hard for you to filter yourself.
Jules: You'd make a pretty girl.
Jeff: And we're off.
Jules: Seriously, I have a skirt that's a little too big for me and God knows you have the legs. All we have to do is shave you down and then tuck some stuff back.
Jeff: No tucking.

Cougar Town Season 1 Episode 12 Quotes

Bobby: The paint can game is the greatest thing I've ever created in my life.
Travis: And thank you dad.

Jeff: The stay at home and drink date? Always dangerous. Alcohol makes it hard for you to filter yourself.
Jules: You'd make a pretty girl.
Jeff: And we're off.
Jules: Seriously, I have a skirt that's a little too big for me and God knows you have the legs. All we have to do is shave you down and then tuck some stuff back.
Jeff: No tucking.