Phoebe: Ooh! We can eat the wax! It's organic!
Chandler: Oh boy, food with hair on it.
Phoebe: Well, not the used wax!
Chandler: Because that would be crazy?

Oh, I knew something had to be wrong, because my fingernails did not grow at all yesterday.

Phoebe

Rachel: (Ordering a pizza) We'd like to order a large pizza.
Ross: (To Rachel) No anchovies.
Rachel: With extra anchovies.
Ross: That's all right; I'll just pick 'em off.
Rachel: And could you please chop some up and put them right there in the sauce?

Phoebe: (As Rachel hits Ross) Should we do something?
Chandler: Yeah, never cheat on Rachel.

Ross: I thought our relationship was dead!
Rachel: Well, you sure had a hell of a time at the wake!

Phoebe: (About waxing) This happens to be a pain no man will ever experience.
Chandler: I don't think you can make that statement until you've been kicked in an area God only meant to be treated nicely.

Phoebe: (On the phone) Hi, it's Phoebe. Someone needs to take my 9:00, because it's like, 9:15, and I'm not there.

Ross: Gunther! Please tell me you didn't tell Rachel about me and the girl from the copy center.
Gunther: I'm sorry. Was I not supposed to?

Monica: You broke up?
Rachel: Yeah, but it's okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
Monica: Oh no! Rachel! You and Mark?
Rachel: No, no, no. It's okay, calm down. Mark and I talked, and I realized how much I love your stupid brother. And yeah, we got our problems, but I really wanna make it work.

Ross: I made a mistake, okay?
Rachel: A mistake? What were you trying to put it in, her purse?

Phoebe: Why are you mopping your ceiling?
Monica: There's banana on it.
Phoebe: Oh. I have the spirit of an old Indian woman living in mine.

Phoebe: (About Ross and Rachel) They've been quiet for a long time.
Joey: Maybe she killed him.

Friends Season 3 Episode 16 Quotes

Ross: (About sleeping with Chloe) Listen, can you keep this information to yourself?
Isaac: Aw, no problem dude. You know we got to look out for each other. We're the same, you and me.
Ross: Actually, no, we're not.
Isaac: Yeah, we are.
Ross: No, we're not.
Isaac: Yeah, we are.
Ross: No, we're not!
Isaac: Okay, we're not.
Ross: Right.
Isaac: But, we are.
Ross: Fine. I just need to know that you're not gonna tell your sister.
Isaac: I can promise not to tell her again.

Ross: (About telling Rachel that he slept with another woman) What is she gonna say when I tell her what I did?
Chandler: Well, before we answer that, I think we should address the more important question. How dumb are you?
Ross: What?! Look, we're trying to rebuild a relationship here, right? How am I supposed to do that without being totally honest with each other?
Joey: Look, Ross, look, I'm on board about this totally honesty thing. I am just not about stuff that's gonna get you in trouble.
Chandler: He's right. Nobody's gonna benefit, and you're just gonna hurt her.
Joey: Yeah, and there won't be a relationship left to rebuild.
Ross: Yeah, but don't you think...
Chandler: All right look, if you absolutely have to tell her, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.