Joey: Wow! Look at that! The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Chandler: You got a Cheeto on your face, man.

Monica: Oh, you're a grandpa.
Richard: Yeah. Are we nuts here?
Monica: I don't know, maybe. I mean I'm dating a man whose pool I once peed in.
Richard: I didn't need to know that.

Rachel: You know, Dr. Burke kissed me once.
Monica: When?
Rachel: When I was, um, seven. I crashed my bike right out in front of his house, and to stop me from crying he kissed me right here. (Points to the tip of her nose)
Phoebe: Oh, you are so lucky.
Rachel: I know.

Joey: (Watching Beavis and Butthead in their barcaloungers) Is that the fire alarm?
Chandler: Yeah. (Feels the floor) Oh, it's not warm yet. We still have time.
Joey: Cool.

Rachel: Ah, so what are we looking at?
Ross: Well, uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one? That is Ursa Major.
Rachel: Really?
Ross: I've no idea. Could be.

Monica: (About her date) It's Richard Burke.
Ross: Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why, why should that bother me? I, I love that man. He's like a uh, brother to dad.

Ross: Well we just wanted to stop by and, uh, say goodnight.
Chandler, Joey, & Phoebe: Goodnight.
Ross: Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
Rachel: All right you guys, I'm taking off my shirt.
Joey: (Using a spoon to look behind him) Nah, she's lying.

Phoebe: You know you should go outside and be with the three-dimensional people.
Joey: No, inside good, outside bad.

Richard: I'm going to look into your eyes now.
Monica: Really?
Richard: Yeah, that's my job. All right, look up... look down, now open your eyes, now look down. That's right, look into the light. Now look at me... Okay. Your eyes look good. Those are good eyes.

Ross: Hi.
Chandler & Joey: Hey.
Joey: What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
Ross: That was 14 hours ago.

(Starting to laugh) I'm sorry. Oh God, I'm sorry, it's just that when you moved your hands down to my butt, it was like "Woah, Ross's hands are on my butt!" Sorry.

Phoebe: (About Richard) Okay, so what, you're just never gonna see him again?
Monica: Not never. I mean, I'm gonna see him tomorrow at my eye appointment.
Phoebe: Didn't you, like, just get your eyes checked?
Monica: Well yeah, but, you know, uh, twenty seven is a dangerous eye age.

Friends Season 2 Episode 15 Quotes

Monica: Oh, you're a grandpa.
Richard: Yeah. Are we nuts here?
Monica: I don't know, maybe. I mean I'm dating a man whose pool I once peed in.
Richard: I didn't need to know that.

Joey: Wow! Look at that! The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job is protected by the Miracle Wax.
Chandler: You got a Cheeto on your face, man.