Joey: So, so, what'd you think?
Chandler: Almost as good as that play with the two naked girls on the see-saw.
Joey: I, I wasn't in that.
Chandler: I know.
(To Tommy) Step away from the duck.Chandler
Joey: Uh, you guys this is, this is Kate's understudy, Lauren.
Rachel: Oh, hi!
Rachel: Hey. Gosh, you look so familiar.
Lauren: Oh, yeah! I, I ran into you in the hallway in your building. It was right after I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
Joey: I don't get you, Kate. First you hate me, then you sleep with me, then you want nothing to do with me, and now you want me again?
Kate: What, you've never dated an actress before?
Joey: Uh, listen I gotta double check for tickets tonight. Who, who got what?
Chandler, Phoebe & Rachel: I had one.
Monica: I need two. I'm bringing Pete. My boyfriend. I have a boyfriend now!
Joey: Two it is. Ross, how about you?
Ross: Uh, yeah, I, ah, I also need two.
Monica: Really? Who's number two?
Chandler: Who's number two? One of the more difficult games sewer workers play.
Ross: Uh, no, it's, it's just this person.
Phoebe: Like a date type person?
Ross: Yeah, kinda. It's this woman from work. I hope that won't be too weird. Will it, Rach?
Rachel: No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so...
Joey: But you said one.
Rachel: I meant, me plus one!
Joey: Okay. (to Phoebe and Chandler) Did, ah, you guys mean you plus one?
Cailin: (About Pete and Monica) So. How'd you guys meet?
Pete: Well ah, the short version is, I ah pursued her for a couple of months, then I gave her a check for $20,000, and she was mine.
Monica: Yeah, and in the long version, I dump him for telling people the short version.
Chandler: (Entering, carrying the chick and duck) Hey! Can you take a duck and a chick to the theater?
Monica: Of course not.
Chandler: Okay. I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.
I've kept myself busy. (Monica and Rachel go in their rooms and walk right back out) I put your stuff in her room and her stuff in your room.Phoebe
Monica: Okay, here's the thing.
Pete: The thing! Oh no, I hate the thing. What's the thing?
Chandler: Now you stay out here and you think about what you did!
Ross: That's a duck.
Chandler: That's a bad duck!
(To Chandler) You know, with that goatee, you kind of look like Satan.Joey
Monica: Can you believe he just offered me a restaurant?
Rachel: What a bitch. I'm gonna kick his ass.