Futurama Season 2 Episode 7: "A Head in the Polls" Quotes
Fry: Well, at least now you can pay off your loan shark.
Bender: Yeah, right. What's he gonna do, break my legs?
Bender: Hello, peasants.
Leela: Bender? What happened to you?
Fry: Yeah, you look different. Did you get a haircut?
Bender: No, I sold my body.
Farnsworth: Sold your body? Oh, Bender, I've been down that road. I know it's glamorous and the parties are great but you'll end up spending every dollar you make on jewellery and skintight pants.
Morbo: News of the mines closing sent titanium prices skyrocketing.
Bender: Alright! I'm rich!
Leela: What are you talking about?
Bender: My body's 40% titanium! I'm finally richer than those snooty ATM machines.
Fry: Too bad you can't spend it.
Bender: Oh, can't I?
Fry: No.
Linda: In other local news, disaster struck on Saturn's moon of Titan today, when a titanium mine collapsed, trapping 1,000 robot workers.
Bender: What? Lord have mercy!
Linda: Unless something is done quickly, the trapped robots will be dead within 300 years. Sir, what rescue operations are planned?
Mine Spokesman: The plan is basically to pave over the area and get on with our lives.
Linda: And so, with two weeks left in the campaign, the question on everyone's mind is who will be the next President of Earth? Jack Johnson or bitter rival John Jackson? Two terrific candidates, huh, Morbo?
Morbo: All humans are vermin in the eyes of Morbo.
At the booth for the Voter Apathy Party
Fry: Now here's a party I can get excited about. Sign me up!
V.A.P. Man: Sorry, not with that attitude.
Fry: OK then, screw it.
V.A.P. Man: Welcome aboard, brother!
Fry: Alright!
V.A.P. Man: You're out.
Sure, humans are cute, but how else are we supposed to test cosmetics?
Zoidberg
Farnsworth: So what are you doing to protect my constitutional right to bear doomsday devices?
N.R.A. Man: Well, first off, we're gonna get rid of that three-day waiting period for mad scientists.
Farnsworth: Damn straight! Today, the mad scientist can't get a doomsday device, tomorrow it's the mad grad student. Where will it end?
N.R.A. Man: Amen, brother. I don't go anywhere without my mutated anthrax... for duck hunting.
Amy: So, is it true you can make all kinds of shirts and ropes out of hemp?
Stoned Guy: Dave's not here, man.
Amy: I also heard hemp makes great shampoo.
Stoned Guy: It does? No way! I gotta check out this brochure!
Woman: We favour unreasonably huge subsidies to the Brain Slug Planet.
Fry: OK, but what are the Brain Slugs who control you gonna do for the working man?
Woman: Attach Brain Slugs to them.
Fry: Sure, you say that now!
Fry: What party do you belong to, Bender?
Bender: I'm not allowed to vote.
Fry: 'Cause you're a robot?
Bender: No, convicted felon.
Zoidberg: You know, Fry, you could join a third party, maybe.
Amy: Only weirdos and mutants join third parties.
Zoidberg: Really? I'd better keep an eye out at the next meeting.
