Morgan: Mr. Bender, about last night: That was just a... a misunderstanding.
Bender: Oh, you didn't understand? Well let me explain. You were having sex with you.
Morgan: No. You see, a bureaucrat of my rank isn't supposed to fraternise.
Bender: That's what makes it so juicy. It's the forbidden fruit angle everybody loves. First I'll say "You'll never guess who saw Fry and Morgan doing it," and they'll say "Who, Bender? Who?" and I'll say "It was lovable old Bender."

Bender: Oh, now I see! Now I get it. Now the pieces are falling into place: The office, the promotion, that dwarf in my book club who steals my opinions. It's all coming together now!...
[Scene: Outside Robot Arms Apartments. Morgan is driven away in a taxi]
Bender:... I must say, this opens my eyes. Another case closed, my dear Watson.
Fry: Morgan, come back! He's stuck in a loop.
Bender: For I was blind but now I see!

Fry: Morgan? It's 3am.
Morgan: I know. A skunk knocked over my garbage and suddenly all I could think of was you.

Bender: That pencil-pushing scazwag. Why, if she were here, I'd... Uh-oh, is she behind me?
Morgan: No. I'm in front of you.

Amy: I can't figure why she's so nice to you, Fry.
Zoidberg: She's a hateful monster, this Morgan. She scolded and hit me. I tell you, she's risking my friendship with her.

Morgan: And Fry, as for you, I am promoting you to executive delivery boy. You will no longer go on deliveries and you will have your own office next to mine.
Fry: Alright!
Morgan: Mr. Bender, would you high-five him so we can continue this meeting?

Morgan: Mr. Bender, you are now in charge of co-ordinating the Professor's bodily functions.
Farnsworth: That's a full-time job.

LaBarbara: This is no spa, it's a forced-labour camp.
Hermes: Curse that Dr. Zoidberg! If I get out of here, he'll be looking down the business-end of a shrimp fork.

Morgan: Now listen, you filthy pig. No one can know about us. If anyone asks, I'll deny it.
Fry: Just like every other girl I've dated.

Fry: What the hell's going on? I thought you were anti-dirty not pro-dirty.
Morgan: I'm surrounded by neat freaks everyday. There's nothing kinkier to me than a filthy slop-jock like you.
Fry: Oh, stop!

Uh, wait, this is the other Fry's locker. I'm "Phry" with a P-H.

Fry

Morgan: I- I've never seen anything like this. Why is there yoghurt in this cap?
Fry: Uh, I can explain that. See, it used to be milk and, well, time makes fools of us all.

Futurama Season 2 Episode 14 Quotes

Zoidberg: Now it's time for my song! When I was two, there was a tidal wave in-
Closing Credits
Zoidberg: Aw.

Hermes, wait. We're having a poker party. Stay and whip off a batch of your famous jerk dip.

Leela