Walter: Are you aware that tom just left the house with a grown woman?
Allison: oh uh.. she's fifteen, Walter
Walter: Was she sent from some island to protect mankind?

• Permalink: Are you aware that tom just left the house with a grown woman? ...
• Added: January 22, 2009

Gary: Are you okay?
Tom: No I'm not okay, my heart is beating so fast my tie is moving

• Permalink: Are you okay? No I'm not okay, my heart is beating so fast my ...
• Added: January 22, 2009

Gary: Hey son, when are you leaving for the big dance?
Tom: As soon as cowzilla rips the roof off and plucks me out

• Permalink: Hey son, when are you leaving for the big dance? As soon as co...
• Added: January 22, 2009

Fine, but we are officially even. After this, I don't want to hear how my big head ruined your body

Tom [to his mom]

• Permalink: Fine, but we are officially even. After this, I don't want to h...
• Added: January 22, 2009