Luke: Uh, listen, I just want you to know that I had a little talk with Jess earlier.
Lorelai: You did?
Luke: Yes, I did, and I really laid down the rules concerning him and Rory. Trust me, he now knows that I am going to be watching them every second they are together.
Lorelai: Oh good.
Luke: Yup.
Lorelai: You know, they're together now.
Luke: What?
Lorelai: Oh yeah. 'I have to get a part for my car,' 'I'm going to go study' - that's kid code for 'Meet me at the previously agreed upon location far away from my clueless uncle.'
Luke: You're kidding me, right? You don't really think that...damn, they are! They're together. They used the kid code and now they're together!

Rory: Can we not say the word "college" for at least forty-eight hours?
Lorelai: Fine.
Rory: Thank you.
Lorelai: How 'bout "collage," can we say "collage"? 'Cause it sounds the same, but it's actually very different.
Rory: Collage is fine.
Lorelai: Okay, good, 'cause I don't even know how to get through a conversation without using the word collage.

Rory: We go. We look. Hi Yale. Bye Yale. It's over. No harm, no foul.
Lorelai: How many more two-word sentences can you come up with?

Lorelai: Why are you sitting over there?
Rory: Where?
Lorelai: At that table.
Rory: Huh? How did I get here?
Lorelai: You sat there.
Rory: This chair's very close to that chair so you understand how I could've made the mistake.
Lorelai: Move over here with me?
Rory: Why don't you move over here with me?
Lorelai: Because I'm not the one who sat in the wrong chair.
Rory: I think it's a little presumptuous to assume that my chair is the wrong chair when my chair could just as easily be the right chair.
Lorelai: No.
Rory: Why?
Lorelai: Because I'm the leader of the clan. The provider of the household. The Alpha male. And the one whose feet just fell asleep. So there's absolutely no chance of movement.
Rory: Fine.

Emily: And what do you intend to do with that paper clip?
Lorelai: I intend to carve something really dirty into the bathroom door.
Emily: Lorelai.
Lorelai: What rhymes with Nantucket?

Luke: They did? I was at the dance, how come I didn't know about this?
Lorelai: Because you're you.

Kirk: Luke, where's your lost and found?
Luke: Outside, in the dumpster.

(Lorelai and Emily are talking about the broken button on Emily's skirt)
Emily: I don't believe it. This is a brand new skirt.
Lorelai: Mom, let me see.
Emily: I have this dinner to go tonight. What am I going to do?
Lorelai: Drink a lot. It's easier to explain not wearing a skirt if you're falling down drunk.

Gilmore Girls Season 3 Episode 8 Quotes

Kirk: Luke, where's your lost and found?
Luke: Outside, in the dumpster.

(Lorelai and Emily are talking about the broken button on Emily's skirt)
Emily: I don't believe it. This is a brand new skirt.
Lorelai: Mom, let me see.
Emily: I have this dinner to go tonight. What am I going to do?
Lorelai: Drink a lot. It's easier to explain not wearing a skirt if you're falling down drunk.