I'm gonna make it a habit to not stop and talk to students because this has been a colossal waste of my time.

Sue

So you like show tunes. It doesn't mean you're gay. It just means you're awful.

Sue

Puck: Girl, you got more curves than a Nissan ad.
Mercedes: Seriously? That's what you came up with?

The glee club has lost its voice. It's time for us to get it back.

Will

Puck: I'm a sex shark. If I stop moving, I die.
Mercedes: Me and you would not work out. You're top 40. I'm rhythm and blues.

I did some research, blacks and Jews have a history of sticking up for each other.

Puck

Don't know if it's the missing mohawk or the whining, but I'm not turned on at all right now.

Santana

Puck: I feel like that guy who lost all his hair, then lost all his hair.
Santana : Samson?
Puck : Agassi.

Who is that guy?

Brittany [on mohawk-shaven Puck]

get ready black girl from Glee club whose name I can't remember right now. The Puckster is about to make you his.

Puck

What's the point in living when I suck so much?

Puck

Rachel: I have chosen Miley Cyrus' "The Climb" because it's about overcoming obstacles and beating the odds. In my case, the obstacle is you: my lackluster teammates who refuse to carry their own weight.

Glee Season 1 Quotes

You buy us dinner and we make out in front of you. It's like the best deal ever.

Cheerleader

And that gay terrorist went on to become the first gay president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln.

Sue