My sex tape with JD Saligner was a disaster.


Santana: Breakfast makes you confused.
Brittany: Sometimes it's sweet, sometime it's salty. What if I have eggs for dinner? What is that?

Brittany: I really like when we make out and stuff.
Santana: Which isn't cheating because?
Brittany: The plumbing's different.

Those weren't weird faces. Those were my sexy faces.


Lauren: Puckerman, it's your lucky day.
Puck: You're finally gonna let me motorboat those twins?

Picking up some coffee. I like my enemas piping hot.


I get my information from Woody Woodpecker cartoons.


Sex. It's just like hugging. Only wetter.


Will: Right now, I'm the president of the Celibacy Club.
Holly: That's a waste of some fine man butt.

Will: I'm not following.
Holly: It's Jazzercise, Will. It really isn't that hard.

I'm off to have CRAZY sex. Because I'm CRAZY informed about it. Kidding.


Holly [on abstinence] It's like saying vegetarianism is an option for lions.

Glee Season 2 Quotes

May I have this dance?


They look like deep fried deep poop.

Brittany [on tater tots]