Chuck: You're making a big mistake.
Louis: In thinking that Blair could be trusted? Yes. She will always have her secrets. She can't exist without them/ You were right after all.
Chuck: You shouldn't listen to me. If you read Dan's book you know how I turn out. You have a chance at having love in your life. Not ending up alone, hanging in a closet. Don't give up. Or your own fact will be someone else's fiction.

Blair: You'd better hope I can stop your fantasy life from destroying my real one.
Dan: Blair, I never wanted us to come between you too.
Blair: When are you going to get it through your head? There's no us! There never was. There's nothing here but friendship, and even that's gone now.

Serena: Is this what you've been trying to tell me all day?
Blair: No, because it never happened. {to Louis} It never happened!
Louis: I don't believe a word you say! You said yourself that Dan has no imagination.
Dan: Okay, thanks. But Louis, it didn't happen.

Looks like the best piece of fiction is that people are actually happy for Dan Humphrey.

Gossip Girl

Serena: I could lose my job over this.
Blair: I could lose my fiancée.
Serena: What?

Serena: Hey, do you know where Dan is? Can you believe what he wrote about me?
Chuck: Which part? Sabrina is glamorous, sexy, beautiful.
Serena: Selfish, insensitive, shallow.
Chuck: I can tell you from experience, everyone loves a villain.
Serena: Yeah, I told Blair the same thing. But then I realized if that's true, why are you always alone?
Blair: Not one word! Have you seen Dan?
Serena: No, have you?
Both: Did you see what he wrote me?!
Serena: No, I didn't have time to read all of it. Just the parts about me.
Blair: Me too.
Chuck: Check the study.

Don't bother lying. Or hanging up. We met this morning when you were Charlie Rhodes.

Diana

"Flighty"? "Irresponsible?" I'm gonna kill him.

Serena

Can we dare believe? Queen B and Lonely Boy doing the deed? Even I have to admit, it's a novel idea.

Gossip Girl

Chuck: You spend extra time doing your hair tonight, Nathaniel?
Nate: Ha ha. I don't mind that Dan made me gay.
Chuck: No, I was actually a little offended he didn't make me gay. Personally I thought you'd be more annoyed being conflated with Eric.

Sam: There's this novel going around town with this character based on Serena. Sabrina is a totally shallow self-obsessed party girl. Yes, I finished it.
Serena: Aren't you being a little reductive?
Jane: And ridiculous. Daniel lives on a farm in Ireland, his cow's probably giving birth right now. And everything isn't about Serena.

Sam: I told him that you're Sabrina. I hope that's not a problem.
Serena: No, not at all. It's nice to play such a big part in Dan's book. We've always been close.
Sam: Ugh. He must have been a saint to put up with you that long.

Gossip Girl Season 5 Episode 4 Quotes

Alessandra: They're coming tonight, right?
Dan: To the book party? No. I haven't exactly mentioned it to them yet. But I'd have to tell them the book exists first.
Alessandra: They don't know? Not any of them?
Dan: No. I'm not sure they're going to like it when they find out.
Alessandra: If they're really your friends they'll be happy to see your star rise. And they should be at the soirée tonight. When everybody learns that Anonymous is actually Daniel Humphrey.

Dan: Quick question: how big can my head get before it explodes?

Gossip Girl Season 5 Episode 4 Music

  Song Artist
Quite nice people Quite Nice People Ida Maria iTunes
Ghost in your bed Ghost In Your Bed My Gold Mask iTunes
Song Jacksons Morning Brush Carlin Music