How I Met Your Mother Season 6 Episode 2: "Cleaning House" Quotes
Kids, your Uncle Barney grew up without a dad, and it always made him feel incomplete, but as he hugged Loretta surrounded by the boxed up remnants of his happy childhood, he realized he had one hell of a mom.
Ted's voice over
Why do white people like Carrot Top?
Barney
Man, try to hail a cab in Manhattan, am I right? Nope, no one's stopping for this.
Barney
Can't we just let the guy be black for a day?
Marshall
Ted: If Sam only knew Loretta for a few months he couldn't possibly be Barney's father.
Robin: He's also quite the detective.
Look at us... it's like three of the same guy. Oh my god, this explains why I was always so good at basketball. Guys, I'm black, sorry African American, no I'm allowed to say both.
Barney
Ah, Valentines, the second base of third grade.
Barney
No Santa needs protein.
Marshall
Lily: Then there's the most popular parental lie in history: Santa.
Marshall: But that's a good lie. Like when we tell Ted he'll meet the right girl and settle down.
Flip Wilson, Bill Cosby, James Earl Jones, Meadowlark Lemon? The list goes on and on.
James
Janie Masterson's mother is whore. With gin on her breath at ten in the morning, she's got some nerve kicking us out of the car pool.
Post Master General
Robin: What, you know what you're doing down there.
Ted: Oh Teddy West Side can bring it, we know this.
