Molly: Why don't you stay with your mom tomorrow night?
Mike: For the same reason I don't chew on tinfoil or try to kiss bears.

• Permalink: Why don't you stay with your mom tomorrow night? For the same ...
• Added: May 07, 2012

I told that woman I loved her, laid my heart out for her, and she chopped it up like we were at Benihanas!

Carl

• Permalink: I told that woman I loved her, laid my heart out for her, and sh...
• Added: May 07, 2012

Molly: That reminds me, make sure Victoria wears a bra tomorrow.
Joyce: I'll try, but it's like trying to keep a hat on a dog.

• Permalink: That reminds me, make sure Victoria wears a bra tomorrow. I'll...
• Added: May 07, 2012

I look like a portly James Bond. Double - X Seven.

Mike

• Permalink: I look like a portly James Bond. Double - X Seven.
• Added: May 07, 2012

Molly: You're gonna kill him right? Please tell me you're gonna kill him.
Mike: If I say yes, it's premeditated.
Molly: Smart. I love you.

• Permalink: You're gonna kill him right? Please tell me you're gonna kill hi...
• Added: May 07, 2012