NCIS
Mondays 8:00 PM on CBSNCIS Season 16 Episode 16: "Bears and Cubs" Quotes
One thing I am certain of, my future will no longer include NCIS. Jethro, I've done all I have to do. It's time for Dr. Palmer to be the permanent Chief Medical Examiner. I'm sorry. Goodnight.
Ducky
Damn place gets me every time.
DiNozzo Senior
Ed: Hey, Stevie has had challenged you know nothing about. Not everyone is born with your sunny disposition, unencumbered by darkness.
Palmer: Unencumbered. Is that what you think of me? You think that I just came into this world whistling rainbows?
Gibbs: Then how? You and Palmer were the last to see the dry cleaner alive.
Ed: Yeah, but you know we didn't do it. [pause] Don't you?
Palmer: I may not run NCIS, but make no mistake, I could have a team of agents down here within a matter of minutes.
Peter: You're already in way too deep or else there would be agents here already.
Palmer: I knew the second that I told him that he knew. Worse off, he knows that I know that he knows.
Torres: Well, you know that he knows, he knows that ... never mind. Why did you lie?
McGee [to Bishop]: Wait, did you say meadow muffins?
Gibbs [walking by]: Cut the crap!
Palmer: I can't believe I just lied to Gibbs. And for what?
Ed: Pancakes! Did you ever have pancakes for lunch?
Ed: This was a bear.
Palmer: What?
Ed: Say it was a bear, please. I promise you, Jimmy, it's a matter of life and death. Call it a bear, please.
Bishop: I swear, McGee, your case summaries read more like a good book.
McGee: Thank you. I try to do more than just the backspin.
Bishop: This one is a real page-turner -- it's got mood, intrigue, emotion.
Torres: And a typo. Either that or you misspelled a word. Either way, I caught it.
McGee: Which word is that?
Torres: Weather. As in, "Our agents did the best to weather the storm."
Bishop: I see it! You spelled it "w h" as in "whether or not."
Torres: When, in fact, it should be "w e" as in, "how's the weather?"
McGee: Or as in, "I doubt whether anyone would care either way."
Torres: I care. Am I just anyone?
Bishop: And there is a third way, "w e th" as in bellwether, as in castrated ram.
McGee: Why would anyone say "we'll castrated ram this storm?"
Bishop: I'm just pointing out the nuances of the English language.
