Cece: You look like a character from The Love Guru.
Schmidt: Aw, thank you.

• Permalink: You look like a character from The Love Guru. Aw, thank you.
• Added: February 06, 2013

It was firm but tender. I saw through space and time for a moment, but that's not the point.

Jess

• Permalink: It was firm but tender. I saw through space and time for a momen...
• Added: February 06, 2013

I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me.

Jess

• Permalink: I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me...
• Added: February 06, 2013

Nick, we will talk about this in the morning. But, first, I'm gonna go do stuff with a girl

Winston

• Permalink: Nick, we will talk about this in the morning. But, first, I'm go...
• Added: January 29, 2013

Schmidt: I don't really know what that accent is.
CeCe: English.
Schmidt: I speak English. That isn't English.

• Permalink: I don't really know what that accent is. English. I speak En...
• Added: January 29, 2013

What is the big deal? Let's just suck it up and French a little.

Jess [to Nick]

• Permalink: What is the big deal? Let's just suck it up and French a little.
• Added: January 29, 2013

Holly, he's really happy! He's got a 401K and a six-pack!

Nick

• Permalink: Holly, he's really happy! He's got a 401K and a six-pack!
• Added: January 29, 2013

Nick: You never listen to pipe talk.
Jess: Pipe talk is boring.

• Permalink: You never listen to pipe talk. Pipe talk is boring.
• Added: January 29, 2013

Nick, I need you.

Jess

• Permalink: Nick, I need you.
• Added: January 29, 2013

Nick: Band of Brothers!
Schmidt: Your friendship means nothing to me. Every man for himself!

• Permalink: Band of Brothers! Your friendship means nothing to me. Every m...
• Added: January 29, 2013

Schmidt: I'm gonna have sex tonight. Are you two in?
Winston: Is that the way you wanted to say that?

• Permalink: I'm gonna have sex tonight. Are you two in? Is that the way yo...
• Added: January 29, 2013

Dammit! Been trying to get something going with myself for a full hour. It's like a taffy pole on a hot summer's day.

Schmidt

• Permalink: Dammit! Been trying to get something going with myself for a ful...
• Added: January 29, 2013